They seem like synonyms but they are not.. These two words are sometimes used
interchangeably but give a completely different meaning. Is it just a perspective or do
these two words have a different meaning?
Either way – Alone or lonely, it still is just one..
In sanskrit, when some words are preceded by the letter ‘a’, it signifies an
absence. For example – himsA and ahimsA (to cause hurt and not to cause hurt), drishtA and adrishtA (what can be seen and what is not seen) etc.. In English, even when we prefix the letter ‘a’ to the word lone, we still have a word with a similar meaning and not the opposite 🙂
The word alone does not say much except to seemingly say that ‘we have company’ and this could be a choice that we make – to be ‘alone’.. We seek though the company of things or other fellow beings and we are comfortable with the company too. It is that ‘me and my time’ :-).
I love listening to music when I am alone.
When I am alone at home, I read books.
I don’t like being alone.
I love walking on the beach side alone..
On the other hand, the word lonely says a lot. It perhaps implies the ‘presence’ of a feeling and signifies an absence too..
I feel so lonely. (if lonely was not enough, the word ‘so’ compounds the situation)
It is lonely at the top.
I was with friends and yet felt lonely.
The fact that we feel lonely is not a choice that we make willfully. This happens
perhaps because we feel that others have abandoned us.. or because we have no friends.. and the reasons could be many more..
One of the primary reasons why we feel lonely is also because we think that others don’t
understand what we are going thru. We feel not empathized with, perhaps? There is also a feeling of being let down or to use a stronger word – we feel betrayed..
The sense of loneliness leads to frustration and depression and no amount of company can easily remove this feeling.. It is worthwhile to note though anger will not be a strong
emotion here. Needless to say, frustration and depression is what makes us to say:
No one likes me.
No one understands me.
I want to go away where no one can find me..
People who take the extreme step of ending their life, do so due to this feeling of loneliness..
As sensitive human beings, each one of us is aware of others feeling lonely. We
have been there in that feeling too.. During those times of feeling ‘lonely’, we try to
seek the company of things or people to alleviate the feeling.. and an overdose of it
leads to addiction / obsession.
While to be alone is a choice and to be lonely is not wilfull one, we have the Free Will
to convert a ‘lonely’ feeling into a feeling of ‘being alone, by making the right choices
of company.
We could then perhaps say that absence of ‘lone’ is ‘alone’ 🙂
May 10, 2017 at 12:23 am
Just to increase my own enjoyment of the subject-
‘Alone’ is an adjective governing a person who has by preference or choice or election to be in solitude; a ‘loner’ is a person who has so decided to be ‘alone’. Alone state can be a temporary one as and when decided by the person.
‘Lonely’ is an adjective governing a person who is so, either because he is not wanted and therefore sad frustrated or he is afraid of company assuming he is not wanted and therefore remains solitarily; this may not be a temporary one unless the person makes up his mind to be bold to come out of the shell.
‘Lone’ is an adjective governing a person because of circumstances- neither by choice nor due to fear-examples- lone parent; a husband or wife whose partner is no more etc.
Therefore, before ‘lonely’ can be converted into a person who is ‘alone’, the person concerned has to first achieve an intermediary stage of converting himself into a lovable person or getting rid of his fear.
For a ‘lone’ person to get rid of that state, it entirely depends upon his mental make up to seek another partner given the depth of bondage that person enjoyed with that person’s earlier partner who is no more and therefore could be purely an emotional or psychological issue; however in either case’ it does not have a bearing on his decision to be ‘alone’ as and when he desires to get rid of that ‘lone’ adjective!
Absence of ‘lone’ and ‘loneliness’ (two different physical and mental and physical states governing a person perhaps more leads the person into neutrality rather than automatically to the stage of ‘alone’, which has to be again only by choice!
A state of alone is therefore a more matured state is it not?