Words – how I love them!! Especially their etymology – origin, history and meaning of a word; and more than all of that, I love their usage.

When I heard of the word ‘converse’ being broken down, I was fascinated, to say the least. However, the meaning of this word was broken down differently from what it is.

The etymology states that it is a Latin word – con means with or together and vertere means to turn. Converse means to turn together.

The meaning I heard was a trifle different and this so resonated with me. Con means with or together and verse is a writing that contains a rhythm. Converse means to be together with a rhythm.

We hold many conversations with people and any conversation is always with the intent of being in a rhythm with the other. When the rhythm misses its beat and tune, it is no longer a conversation, it is dissonance, fight, conflict.

So when does it remain a conversation?

When..

– we move (mentally) away from being with the other person and realising this, getting back to being with them in the conversation

– we break the beats and tune and rhythm but try / get back to the rhythm of the other person – we sometimes do get back to the rhythm and we sometimes don’t, but we try and that matters 🙂

– our focus is the conversation for the joy and fun and cause of it; and there is no ‘you’ and no ‘me’

If this is conversation with others, what about conversation with ourselves?

Do we have any?

If no, why aren’t we having conversations with ourselves?

If yes, are we with ourselves and in rhythm with ourselves, during these conversations?

Or in the attempt of being in rhythm with others, are we fighting with ourselves?

Or when we have huge expectations from ourselves, we aren’t in sync with ourselves, leading us to be harsh on ourselves and fight with ourselves? so much of ourselves and yet not 🙂 or is it so much of ourselves and that’s the problem?

In such cases, these are not conversations; these are conflicts.

So how do we have conversations with ourselves?

– We treat ourselves with kindness and respect

– We are what we are with our own strengths and limitations, so our conversation should be appropriately had

– As much as it is ok to do a task well, it is ok to err too

– Be with ourselves to understand why we do what we do

– Be in sync with our own Circadian rhythm

– Be aware of our own personal compass, which would then show us the direction in which we need to have conversation with ourseves

– Have a factual conversation with ourselves; making no assumptions and no judgments

– Give ourselves as long a rope as we give others, if not more – this is a silent conversation 🙂

If we can’t have a conversation with ourselves, who else will?

If not now, when? 

 

** Note –

– In the context of this blog, conversations with ourselves is from a beneficial standpoint and not from a mental health condition standpoint.

– Credits for the emergence of this blog is to a discussion in the Ninjutsu class